BEFORE AND AFTER PHOTOS
|Selfie of M.N., Oct 25, 2020||Selfie of M.N., Dec 22, 2020|
Quote from Commencement Celebration, Dec. 20, 2020, M.N.:
This work was so much harder and so much more involved than Business School, I felt exhausted at times, but incredibly grateful. I feel like I’ve gone inside out, and learned so much about myself. … I do feel reborn, I am actually feeling bittersweet, but I do feel I have a lot more tools that I am equipped with to take on what’s next… I am a better parent even just after two months.
|Selfie of E.N., Oct 25, 2020||Selfie of E.N., Dec 21, 2020|
Quote from Commencement Celebration, Dec. 20, 2020, E.N.:
I had a lot of anger coming into the process, and I didn’t understand it, I didn’t feel like a good person with this anger… The anger represented having my boundaries crossed… I found that the anger was because I felt like I didn’t have a voice, and I felt like I had no power. So one of my breakthroughs was about reclaiming my power, and I did it! It was amazing … There is so much joy in reclaiming my power, I am not as angry as much, because I don’t feel that the world is happening to me, I am co-creating the world around me, and I’m showing up and being present, and I’m saying “Yes” and the Universe is meeting me and saying “Yes” to me too.
|J.F. Sept 8, 2019||J.F. Nov 3, 2019|
Quote from Commencement Celebration, Nov 3, 2019, J.F.:
For the first time in my life I am really experiencing Joy. It’s there, the seed is planted, I don’t know if you can see it vibrating in here, but it’s there, it’s coming out… Now the second half of my life begins, or the second part of the work, if you will. I am going to now give me things I haven’t given myself before…
The one word that I hear all the time is Courage. It’s Courageous to do this [The Process]. And I never really thought about it taking courage. Because this is something I needed to get at, to me it was just I need this, I have to fix myself. I have to be better, I have to understand, give myself more tools to deal with [the childhood trauma].
It’s really been quite a journey, and I now am feeling Joy for the first time in my life. I am feeling Joy. I want to take that out now and give it everybody. Give somebody what I’ve gotten, that I’ve worked really hard to get, that I didn’t know I needed to have. That’s the cool part. [Then he performed a little Joyful Dance.]
Quote from Commencement Celebration, Nov 3, 2019, K.C.:
I went into these nine weeks [The Process] with a bit of reticence, I’d done therapy in the past and my parents put me in therapy as a kid. I’d even done a week-long therapeutic process focusing on the effects of childhood trauma. Though each had helped me, I’d found myself returning to the same old patterns of numbness and disgruntlement. This pattern underlay my life so thoroughly that it just it just felt like the normal state of being. The Process provided guidance and support over months, allowing me to identify the root of these reactive patterns, to release many of them and accept more of the guidance that my emotions could offer me.
For much of my life I’ve not known what to do with emotions. I mostly didn’t feel, but would periodically have a strong emotional reaction surface and immediately subside. I didn’t have the fluency to name what was percolating in me or the curiosity to find out why. I tried to fix myself by identifying anger issues and improving communication skills, but never really understood what the point of an emotion like anger was. The Process helped me access some early memories that i needed to come to terms with. In doing so I opened up to a wider and subtler range of emotions. I’d known (theoretically) that emotions could be useful indications of my decision-making ethics, but my emotional numbness had prevented putting this knowledge into practice.
Ultimately, with the help of The Process work I was able to track the resentment and disconnect I’ve carried to my early family experience and the burn trauma in my first year of life. I came to see that my reaction to this trauma was still running me. Since beginning to heal this I’m noticing more joy, confidence and curiosity in my daily life.
Thank you, this has opened up a lot for me. It feels like a major turning point for me
|R.R. March 10, 2019||R.R. May 5, 2019|
Quote from Commencement Celebration, May 5, 2019, R.R.:
Before the Process, I could feel a well of anger inside of me that I couldn’t release on my own. The Process helped me to locate the instances in my childhood where that energy was locked up. Even with the other spiritual work I had done, I couldn’t let go of the anger without a deeper approach like the Process. Going through the 9 week program helped me to locate not only those instances where that energy was stuck, but also to locate myself in the midst of those circumstances. That has been incredibly freeing.
At the end of the Process, I asked my partner what she sees in me now vs. before I started. She said that she saw more strength as well as a sparkle. I never had a sense of a sparkle before. I am a buddha guy, but now I’m a buddha with a sparkle. I feel more multidimensional, like I’m a richer version of myself.
One of the things I come back to frequently is how important the heart is for this kind of work, and how much I just want to keep opening, opening to it all. The Process really supports that continuous opening, and it’s allowed me to experience a much deeper freedom within myself.
|T.H. March 10, 2019||T.H. May 5, 2019|
Quote from Commencement Celebration May 5, 2019, T.H.:
I have been a student at [a spiritual school] for 12 years, I have a rich meditation practice, I am a part of a lay ministry that shows me ways to be with God, my spirit, and my heart connection. But it always felt like something was missing, something integral. I came in [to the Process] a little arrogant! … Jamie (a Process therapist/body worker) said “The truth will set you free.” I wasn’t in my body listening. I was like, I knew I could get through this by closing my eyes, and going up in my chakras, doing it all in total neutrality, using all my tools that I knew…
One of the revelations of spiritual work is that you have to break to be given, to be beloved. I broke that day [with body work], And that’s when I found that deeper recess of my heart. And I never let go of that.
I feel a magnificence coming from my heart. Instead of just expanding up and out, I am expanding through my heart. I feel this alignment [between inner child, intellect, and spiritual self], there is a sense of unity, and wholeness: and that feeling that something was missing went away.
AUDIO CLIPS, Recorded November 18, 2012
The following audio clips of Process Graduates were recorded on November 18, 2012, at “Friends and Family.” You may need to enable a QuickTime media player to hear them.
Kaia (2012 Process Graduate, not her real name) was too busy, but she took the Process anyhow. (01:08)
Stephanie (2012 Process Graduate) describes how she ran away from the Process, and finally learned how to feel. (04:56)
Christine (2009 Process Graduate) talks to the new graduates about her experiences since completing her Process. (02:46)
Nelson took the Process in 2011 while commuting from Atlanta. He discusses his first year post-Process (05:01).
|“The Process returned to me a knowledge of the deepest parts of myself. This was an experience more profoundly healing than I imagined possible.”|
|–Susan Griffin, Author of Woman & Nature: The Roaring Inside Her|
“Completing the Process is the single most important thing I have done, for myself, in my life. The Process took me on a journey of discovering the realities of what went on in my childhood and how those events, experienced growing up, shaped me into the person I am. Through this work, I became aware of how to recognize negative traits in myself and where they came from.The Process gave me the tools to use which offer me a choice in how to respond, instead of reacting, to situations and people who I interact with. The Process led to a profound awareness in me, which was necessary for me to experience in order to grow to a place of true acceptance of self. I learned to have courage in facing my fears, to grieve, let go, forgive and heal.
“I continue in my growth as an individual and in my ability to sense and know higher truth as a direct result of my Process work. There is a deep connection to my spiritual self and a profound awakening that has changed my life. Completely the Process is an amazing, transformational experience. I am deeply grateful for the teachers who supported me on my journey and continue to do this important work with others.”
— Cherril L., Process graduate
|“The greatest gift I ever gave myself was the Process. It continues to change my life and the lives of those close to me.”|
|— Lu B., Process graduate|
“I am still very pleased that I did the process some 32 years ago.”
–Joe Mayfield, email written in 2013
|“It’s been 15 years, and I’m still grateful for the indelible mark The Process made on my life – what an illuminating experience, and such highly gifted therapists to work with. Much ♥ and respect to you all!”|
|— Melissa Z., Process graduate, Posted on our Facebook page, 2011|
“I am also a graduate from the late 80’s and I am so glad I know so much more about myself and who I am. This program 20 years later is still working for me.”
— Maryon M., Process graduate, Posted on our Facebook page, 2011
|“The Process was very beneficial and I will always be grateful for the opportunity and the growth that I achieved through it. My interactions with people are much more rewarding, fulfilling and meaningful than before the Process. And they only continue to improve.”|
|— Colette H., Process graduate, written 1 1/2 years after her Process|
“Our baby boy was born on Sunday. Dave [husband, also a Process Graduate] has been awesome. I can’t begin to tell you what an amazing support system he has been and is continuing to be. He was right there by my side during the entire labor and delivery and has started to multi-task and is running around the house doing – EVERYTHING! it’s been great.
Thank you so much for The Process and I think all the time of where I was and where I am today with our new baby and all that has happened. It’s been a wild ride and it’s just keeps getting better.”
— Christine W., Process graduate, written 1 year after her Process
|“The Process changed my life is so many ways that I could never have imagined possible. It enabled me to free myself from old behavior patterns that kept me stuck and caused me much frustration. Once I gained the insight into the ways my thought processes created my reality, I was able to make different choices and bring about profound changes in the way I engage with life. It is now seven years since I graduated from the Process and I’m still benefiting from what I learnt through the professional help I received then. I credit the Process work for allowing me to create a richer inner life and cultivate a source of strength and stability within myself. Because of the profound changes that I was able to realize after completing the Process, I now have a successful new career at age 52 and look forward to what life has to offer next. The possibilities seem endless when we allow our unchained souls the freedom to fly. And the Process helped me do just that.”|
|— Helen S., Process graduate|
“My personal changes have led me through various disciplines of which, The Process was the most significant and fundamentally changing and without hyperbole, saved my life.
“I am forever thankful for my time with The Process. It’s funny because I was a pull it up by the boot straps kinda guy and disdained “therapy”. I knew, though that when I did my [Process] intake …[after] an intro weekend, that The Process had what it took to reach into me and make changes.”
— Juan L., Process graduate, written 30 years after his Process
“The Process not only changed my life, but also the lives of my children, because I learned how to parent them really well.”
— Jessica L., Process graduate and single parent
|“Thanks for saving my life years ago.”|
|— Jack R., Process graduate. Written eleven years after his Process|
“Thank you all as I can really see the process unfolding more and more.”
— Jennie M., Process graduate. Written six months after her Process.
|“A couple of weeks ago, I was noticing how different I am, different in a positive way. I thought ‘It is truly amazing how different I am now compared to how I was before I did the Process.’ I then remembered Ron’s question on Day 1: ‘How many of you intend to have a miraculous transformation …’ “|
|— Mike F., Process graduate|
“I was very luck to be able to partake in the program. It is a wonderful program that gave me a real depth of understanding, compassion and forgiveness for my childhood and all the people involved in it including me. This program helped me connect and deepen further my own spirituality and realize that by freeing my heart and nurturing my soul the answers and guidance that I need and want are there within me and all around me. It’s allowed me a very real level of trust and much peace, and I am grateful.”
— Andrea B., Process graduate, dancer
|“Initially, the Process made me aware of the games that people were playing and the games that I was playing inside myself. Today, 20 years later, the Process continues to deepen and nourish my essence — may we meet again in the light.”|
|— Jon S., Process graduate|
“In 1974, I was a divorced parent (my choice), 27 years old, about to start work on my Ph.D. at Stanford. Everything was going well for me. Except that I found myself yelling at my two children, ages 4 and 6, when they didn’t deserve it. The therapy I chose at that time was the Process, as offered by the Institute for Personal Change…
“I thought I took the Process for myself back in 1974. But in fact, I took it for my grandchildren, and for all the other children of the younger generation. They are the ones who will inherit our world. Because I took the Process and became a more loving and better parent, my son was also able to do the same. His children will grow up with positive and loving parents, which will support them the rest of their lives. This is truly the Grandmother’s joy in watching her grandchildren grow.”
–Elaine B. (Link to full text of “A Grandmother’s Perspective”)
|“May I take this opportunity to thank you for helping me gain insight into my life experience and giving me such powerful tools to take action and change my self perception as well as change my interpersonal relationships. Probably the most beneficial aspect was you re-introducing me to my spiritual self – who I had lost so long ago – I shall never forget how open and loving I felt at graduation – when my spirit soared! … Again my gratitude for, in a sense, giving me life again. My big spirit thanks you.”|
|— Faith W., Process graduate and singer|
“Perhaps the element which attracted me most to doing the Process was the fact that we would include spiritual exercises in our work toward recovery and transformation. One of the reasons I have been impressed with the staff is that each member, in his or her own way, is a person of spirit and commitment to a holistic approach to healing and learning. This is extraordinary in my own experience of therapists and therapies. I am persuaded that part of what we in religions communities (I am an ordained minister) have to learn from places like the Institute for Personal Change is a way of integrating more of our minds, bodies and spirits as we seek to care for ourselves, others, and our planet. Finally, it was important to me in my own reclaiming of my past to do so in a context which acknowledged my own spiritual practices…several of which I continue to use three years after my Process graduation.”
–Wilma R., Process graduate and minister
|“As a single parent and a recovering alcoholic I felt continually at loose ends and not able to ‘get on top of it,’ both financially and emotionally. Both my children and I were suffering because of it. The work that we did in the Process enabled me to reconnect with my spiritual aspect. My relationships with my family, my work and in my community have all deepened and strengthened. I will be forever grateful for this very rich experience.”|
|— Connie F., Process graduate and mother of two|
“I have attended countless workshops touting promises of ‘inner peace’ and ‘fulfilling relationships.’ Most merely offered lessons in behavior modification and were not capable of helping me get to the roots of my behavior. Happily, I discovered that the Process went well beyond the others. It provided me the safest of environments in which to explore my past, and it enabled me to better prepare for my future. Not only am I happier, so are my loved ones.”
— Rich M., Process graduate and financial planner
|“I feel the workshop empowered me to deal with the ‘closet’ issues of my life and gave me the tools to transform past hurts, fears and anger into feelings of being capable, lovable and worthwhile… I now feel free and realize I am a center of pure awareness, fully loving and free to be who I really am.”|
|— Carolyn M., Process graduate and minister|
“The Process has enabled me to reconnect with a part of me, my Spiritual Self, that I had first discovered years ago, but which had lain dormant for years. This reconnection has had a truly transforming effect upon my life. It gives me a valuable tool for coping with life’s everyday challenges. I now know that I posses a refuge within myself where peace, joy, hope, fail and love actually exist.”
–Bruce N., Process graduate and Attorney at Law
|“Without any doubt, this therapy is the most comprehensive and thorough process for helping terminate the problems stemming from early childhood. It is upon this foundation that all other therapy and personal growth can make a deeper and more meaningful impact.”|
|— Armand C., Process graduate and retired bookkeeper|
“The Process was a profound turning point. It was by no means the quick fix I desperately sought, but it was truly a beginning of a new way of life.”
— Jennifer L., Process graduate
|“Before the Process I had no idea who I was. After the Process, for the first time, I knew who I wasn’t.”|
|— Didier B., Process graduate and musician|
“Truth has been something that has always been important to me. In the Process I discovered what real truth is all about. The truths I had been living my life by had been myths that only served to hold me back.”
— Jana R., Process graduate and AIDS hospice administrator
|“I used to want to be anyone else as long as it wasn’t me. The really incredible thing to me is I don’t want to be anyone else anymore.”|
|— Patty T., Process graduate|
“I viewed life through a gray cloud of hopelessness. My experiences in the Process enabled me to see the beauty in living.”
–Penny S., Process graduate
|“The Process enable me to search for truths rather than living by what I was taught.”|
|–Rhody S., Process graduate|
“It’s not about blame, it’s about understanding.“
— Quote from the Process