The Process and PTSD

A post by a Process Graduate:

One of the reasons I took the Process was to handle panic attacks as a result of a series of traumatic events. I have come to terms with calling it PTSD.

I took a trip to visit my hometown shortly after the Process ended. I was apprehensive about visiting and putting my new tools to the test. As I stepped off the plane into the familiar airport, I stepped into a flashback of a single day in the years of trauma that caused my PTSD.

This was not the first time I’d flashed back to that specific day but this time was a completely different experience. I felt waves of panic rising in my body, threatening to suffocate me. I stood frozen, reliving the scene in my child’s mind’s eye. It felt like walking into a wall. As the scene continued and the panic started to take over, my child self began to sob, my intellect soothing and rationalizing my reaction. My higher self swiftly stepped in, reassuring, comforting and simple said “Just watch. This has no power over you.”

With that, I was able to step back and watch the panic response and flashback without being immersed in it. I could examine the scene, take note of the effect it had on me and move through it without drowning in the trauma. After a few minutes the intensity of the feelings faded as did the flashback. As I came back to the present moment I felt empowered and capable. I now have the tools and confidence in my self to move through and learn to live a healthy life with this PTSD. It does not dictate who or how I am. I am more than the trauma I have experienced.

I am so full of gratitude about this result of the Process.

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