A Guiding Light
By Jordana, Process Graduate 2020 “Most people are in a prison from their childhood and rather than move out, they would prefer to decorate their cell”. Ron Luyet, Process Founder Children want an honest relationship. To feel loved, to be…
Creating Presence: One Step at a Time
Being present in our lives can help us create more intimate and meaningful relationships. It can help us make better choices, to handle our emotions with less reactivity and more responsiveness. It can help alleviate suffering. One way I avoid…
The Value of Being Present
Why do the sages and teachers ask us to be more present in our lives? What does it do for us? WHY do we want to be more present? When we are more present, we are more authentic. When we…
33 Years of Sobriety
By L. B. Yesterday I celebrated my 33rd year of continuous sobriety. If anyone had told me that, in the early days, I would have laughed and said, “If I live that long.” Today, my life is peaceful, simple, selective,…
A Process Moment: Childhood Triggers
by Vera Shadle, Process Graduate, 1989 One of those old physical triggers from the past: At coffee hour after I sang at a church service, a little girl accidentally knocked over a (fortunately not full) pitcher of lemonade. I flinched…
Inner Monsters
I recently attended a play, “Beowulf”, which highlights the Hero-Monster continuum. The most important concepts in the play were the ideas that we need the monster in order to have heroes, and that we create our monsters by labeling them…
It’s About Us, Not Them
It’s about us, not them. It is not about what is out there, because that is out of our control. When we have an argument with someone, or something goes wrong in our external world, there may be little or…
Lay Techniques to Alleviate Depression
Emotions happen. We all get depressed or unhappy from time to time. If your depression is not severe or chronic, try some of these ideas. If they don’t help, please talk to your doctor or mental health practitioner. Smile for…
One Successful Choice
A few days ago, I went shopping for vacuum cleaner bags. I went to the local big box hardware store, found what I thought to be the right aisle, but the bags weren’t there. I asked someone for help, he…
Awareness Gives Us Choices
In Feldenkreis movement, the object is to increase awareness of the body, of different parts, how they move, how they interact. If we have awareness of how our body moves, then we will have choices about how we move it,…
The Value of Therapy for Parents and Everyone Else
Most of us are pretty functional, handling the stress of day-to-day life, not usually getting too angry or too upset, or too unhappy. We are reasonable people, reasonably good parents. So why do we need therapy? A happy person is…
An Eye for an Eye Leaves the Whole World Blind
In these contentious, divisive political times, it is incumbent upon us all to examine our beliefs about how to effect change. I don’t want to take a political stand in this blog. I do want to talk about how to…
Attachment Theory and The Process
In the Sunday Jan 8, 2017 New York Times (Sunday Review), an article on Attachment Theory sported the headline: “Yes, It’s Your Parents’ Fault” (https://www.nytimes.com/2017/01/07/opinion/sunday/yes-its-your-parents-fault.html). Attachment theory: the quality of our early attachments profoundly influences how we behave as adults….
Anger and Parenting
We learn to be parents from watching our own parents. If your own parents were not the best parental role models (Did you have a good experience growing up? Do you want to be like your own mother or father?),…
When Our Adult Children Disappoint Us
In the Process, we address issues caused by how we were raised as children. But what happens when our adult children disappoint us? Why do our adult children disappoint us? It is not about them: it’s about us. What are…