Finding Myself, Once Again
Last week I visited my daughter, her husband, and my three grandchildren in Texas. I am the kind of person (“Two” on the Enneagram) who integrates into the situation at hand. I had a wonderful time with the kids, helping…
Procrastination
It’s tax season, a time which is often fraught with procrastination. Many of us have trouble with procrastination. We procrastinate when the action at hand has some expected negative impact on us, or is unpleasant in some way. Filling out…
Trust in Myself
Last week we made a large purchase: a new piano. It’s hard to choose a piano. I found the process daunting. I have been playing for 15 years as an adult, but I am not a musician. I like playing,…
Non-Attachment to Outcome
My husband’s Aunt Rose became our great Buddhist teacher. Aunt Rose was 84 when I met her. She had never married, and lived in a studio apartment in New York City. When Ken’s mother died, Ken and his children became…
Hidden Parents
What does it mean to be a hidden mother/father? We can physically hide from our children by leaving, working too many hours, through illness or taking vacations without the children, or even through death. We can hide emotionally by not…
When I was Stood Up
I made an appointment to have lunch with a person I didn’t know; it was a business meeting with someone who might become a new client. I did have reason to believe that she might not show up, as she…
Romantic Myths
I recently read a piece by Scott Kalechstein <http://www.scottsongs.com/> from 2007, “The Journey of Relationship Going From Here to Maturity.” Let’s focus on three of his “Romantic Bubbles that must be busted.” 1. I can get all my needs met…
The Last Time
I had lunch with a friend the other day. Her husband had died about four months ago. As we were talking, she made a suggestion to me, for how to approach an activity which is sometimes hard for me: What…
Placing Blame
We had a house guest once who did not treat our house as I wanted him to. He crossed my personal boundaries with his behavior. I got mad, but said nothing. Over the next few hours, I seethed and tried…